Finisher

I am a finisher. I start things, in my own good time, and finish them when I am able. I start things solely to have the experience of completing them. This is different, I think, than to start things in order to finish them quicker or better than others. I think it is fine to do things quicker or better than others, if that's what you're into, I guess. It's not for me though. I think I am not alone and there's a lot of us out there, people who do not find satisfaction or validation in comparing themselves with others. Of course for us, the fact that there are others like us is not relevant really, as we do not need external validation, but maybe you competitors out there who don't understand us will feel better.
I think it's hard for people to understand, if they are the competitive sort, what the point of doing difficult things just to do them would be. I also think that a lot of the competitors were just told that the way to evaluate themselves is to measure against others, and that they might actually really dig doing things for the experience of doing them.
I like to set goals that blow my mind a little bit, to do things I never believed I could do. Thanks to the plethora of voices, whispering, shouting, and some just passing notes or giving dirty looks, I entered adulthood with a rather narrow idea of what my options were in life and what I could accomplish. I wasn't raised to beat the standard, but to meet it, and it turns out that the standards set had very little to do with who I was and what my possibilities were or are.
I did not give up on my doctorate because there was so much telling me that it was beyond my reach. I didn't have to be the one with the most publications or job offers at graduation, I just had to graduate. It was so super hard, but I persisted. That mattered more than anything.
Recently I ran an 8 mile race up Lewiston Hill, which is Lewiston Mountain if you are running up it. I did it because I live in Lewiston and I see that Hill all the time, like most of the time my eyes are open. It is inconceivable that anyone would run up it. I knew if I did, the Hill would be a source of inspiration to me on my bad days, and a source of affirmation on my good ones. My race was to finish, which I did. It sucked. I will never do it again.
What would have really sucked would have been to have given up and to have never done it.